Four Yorkshire truckers!
With apologies to Monty Python!
Imagine the scene, a truck stop somewhere in the north of England. It is a warm summers evening and four road weary, “old timers” are sitting around a table outside, quaffing the odd beer and swapping trucking stories.
Obediah: “well that were a right ot’en today wern’t it?”
Gessiah:” aye, yer can say that again, i said yer can say that again”
Jerimiah: “thank the lord we got that new fangled air con in us trucks now”
Alf: (sadly) “ I ain’t got air con in my old crate”
O: “I remember when they were nowt like that in any truck”
G: “aye, no air con, and no heating, I said no heating”
J: aye, we used to sweat our nuts off in’t summer, and freeze em off in’t winter”
A: “no night heater too, we used to af to rub Horse liniment on to keep warm at night”
O:” Used to wake up in’t morning with 3 inches of ice on’t inside o’ windscreen”
G: “Aye, used to freeze your bum to your bunk, i say bum to bunk”
J: “Sleeper cab?”
G:”aye I said aye”
J:” you were lucky, we used to sleep on a plank between seats”
O: “ our plank had rusty nails through it”
A: “Luxury! We used to dream of having a plank wi’ rusty nails in”
J:” well when i say a plank, it were two pencils tied together with barbed wire, but it were a plank to us!”
G:”we were evicted from our plank!”
Mutters of concern......
G: “course in them days we used to drive 18 hours aday wi’out a break, I said 18 ours!”
J:” and more, when we were up in Norway, we used to run all night, and in winter that were six months!”
O: “Course we ad it tough. On’t Moscow route it were minus 50 at night and we used to wrap oursen’ in ice blocks to keep warm, we ad to drive for six weeks with just one day off, and lick truck clean with us tongues!”
A:”Right.....when we were down t’ middle east, it were 200 degrees in shade. We used to drive for 27 weeks with just 2 minutes rest every 5 days to stretch our legs, and natives would catch us, strip us, stake us out in the midday sun, smear honey all over us, and leave us for the ants to eat until we were dead!”
G:” But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL:” nope, nope!”
Imagine the scene, a truck stop somewhere in the north of England. It is a warm summers evening and four road weary, “old timers” are sitting around a table outside, quaffing the odd beer and swapping trucking stories.
Obediah: “well that were a right ot’en today wern’t it?”
Gessiah:” aye, yer can say that again, i said yer can say that again”
Jerimiah: “thank the lord we got that new fangled air con in us trucks now”
Alf: (sadly) “ I ain’t got air con in my old crate”
O: “I remember when they were nowt like that in any truck”
G: “aye, no air con, and no heating, I said no heating”
J: aye, we used to sweat our nuts off in’t summer, and freeze em off in’t winter”
A: “no night heater too, we used to af to rub Horse liniment on to keep warm at night”
O:” Used to wake up in’t morning with 3 inches of ice on’t inside o’ windscreen”
G: “Aye, used to freeze your bum to your bunk, i say bum to bunk”
J: “Sleeper cab?”
G:”aye I said aye”
J:” you were lucky, we used to sleep on a plank between seats”
O: “ our plank had rusty nails through it”
A: “Luxury! We used to dream of having a plank wi’ rusty nails in”
J:” well when i say a plank, it were two pencils tied together with barbed wire, but it were a plank to us!”
G:”we were evicted from our plank!”
Mutters of concern......
G: “course in them days we used to drive 18 hours aday wi’out a break, I said 18 ours!”
J:” and more, when we were up in Norway, we used to run all night, and in winter that were six months!”
O: “Course we ad it tough. On’t Moscow route it were minus 50 at night and we used to wrap oursen’ in ice blocks to keep warm, we ad to drive for six weeks with just one day off, and lick truck clean with us tongues!”
A:”Right.....when we were down t’ middle east, it were 200 degrees in shade. We used to drive for 27 weeks with just 2 minutes rest every 5 days to stretch our legs, and natives would catch us, strip us, stake us out in the midday sun, smear honey all over us, and leave us for the ants to eat until we were dead!”
G:” But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya'.
ALL:” nope, nope!”
